Sin of a God
by ShoZettaSlow
Summary: Light feels guilty ish because he thinks L cares about him. Two- or three-shot, eventual lemon, I like making Light depressed. LightxL, flashback to BBxL.
1. Chapter 1

"**You'll forget about the** **notebook. All you'll remember about this is that you're a suspect."**

"**Good that's all I need."**

"**And of course you'll keep your feelings for Ryuzaki."**

_**That's all I want.**_** "I _don't_ have feelings for him." **

"**Whatever you say, hyuk."**

_**Am I just doing this to protect him from myself?**_

_It doesn't matter!_ He screamed silently at himself. _It doesn't matter! It doesn't matter! It doesn't matter! _His new war cry. He still heard him at night, still felt the cuff around his wrist. He felt hot, strawberry-scented breath on his skin. No one was there when he opened his eyes. _Damnit! He's dead & he still manages to toy with me! Why do I care? He was lying, I know he was. Everything he said was meaningless. I never believed him anyway. _That was a lie; there had always been a small part that did believe it, the same stupidity that Misa allowed to control her. If only he could lose himself like she did, living for someone else & gladly dying for their happiness. _But I couldn't let myself do that. I had to live for the world. _The world…The world was a rotten mess before & without him it would destroy itself. No one else understood. Which was why only he could do it, he was god. If he was god that made L evil, evildoers must be killed. He couldn't let his emotions control his goals.

That's right Light SUFFER!

I think I have a thing for short first chapters.


	2. Chapter 2

Wow this took a while. Er… I'll put another chapter on and... everyone gets cake? Eheheheh ^^'

Next chapter will either be Light again or Beyond Birthday. I have to put B in here though; otherwise I'll die, possibly by him.

It's all in italics because it's a flashback. The squiggle things mean POV change. Squiggles! Also Light doesn't remember anything.

It's fun writing L's dialogue and train of thought just because it's so random.

More groveling apologies.

--

_L looked up from the cake he'd been eating. "What's wrong Raito?" he asked, cocking his head slightly to the side. _

"_Nothing Ryuzaki." Came the harsh reply._

I suppose being chained to someone constantly would get on one's nerves. Still I didn't think he'd be this stressed. _He smiled inwardly. _Seven percent.

"_Hmm I suppose there were certain things I overlooked." Ryuzaki said. They stood side by side staring at the shower. "Would you like to go first then?" _

This was his idea; maybe he'll change his mind about this. _"No, we may as well do it together."_

_L looked at him for a moment "If you insist Raito." He began to undress without a second thought. _

_It felt awkward to be naked with Ryuzaki, even more awkward to shower with him. Probably the worst part was the fact that Raito couldn't resist an occasional glance at the detective, who was washing himself slowly, almost seductively. _He's playing with my head. He still thinks I'm Kira. _"Ryuzaki-" He began. _

_The black haired detective turned & looked at him, his wide grey eyes innocent "Yes Raito?"_

God he's beautiful. _Raito hesitated "I…I know what you're trying to do and…I'm not Kira." _

_Ryuzaki smiled "You assume everything I do is related to the Kira investigation, only Kira would think like that. And I will remind you it was your suggestion to shower together." Raito flushed at this, turning away to hide it. _

_Ryuzaki noticed however. "I had assumed you had some ulterior motive." He murmured "I hadn't expected you to be prone to such thoughts." Then he began muttering to himself "Six percent, no 6.5. No, one innocent thought disproves nothing." He seemed to have forgotten about the other man, which was a relief._

_--_

_Raito stayed up that night thinking. _He knows now, or he at least suspects it. What will he do now? Will he stop the surveillance? Will he cut contact with me completely? No he wouldn't do that while I'm still a suspect. _He sat up to glance at the detective. His face resting on one hand, his mouth slightly open. Moonlight pooled on his pale skin, giving it a slight glow, which brought out the darkness of his hair & the deep shadows from the curves of his neck. _

_Suddenly he turned his head, the whites of his eyes illuminated in the dark. "What is it Raito?" _

_Snapped out of his trance, the younger man's thoughts whirled as he tried to think of an excuse. "Nothing Ryuzaki, I just had a nightmare." It sounded so stupid and childish, why couldn't he think of anything better? He almost expected the detective to laugh, something he'd never seen, but instead L rather awkwardly took him in his arms in an almost motherly gesture. He allowed himself to breathe the older man's scent - a tangy sweetness mixed with clean – resisting the urge to bury his face in the bony chest. _

_They stayed like that for a moment before L murmured softly into Raito's hair. "I still believe you're Kira."_

"_I know, it doesn't matter." _

"_Wouldn't Miss Amane be upset?" _

_Light sighed "I have no feelings for that woman, you know that. I just don't want to cause her pain, she seems somewhat unstable." _

_Ryuzaki nodded. "I understand. That's very noble of you, Raito." _

"_I still need this, Ryuzaki." _

"_As you wish." He brought the chain of the handcuffs around Raito's shoulders and pulled him into a kiss, leaning back and pulling the younger man with him. His graceful hands working quickly. Before long he had stripped them both._

"_You've done this before, haven't you?"_

"_I've never actually initiated, but I've observed these actions being done to me." He guided Raito's head to his neck. "Don't tell me you've never done this, Raito."_

_The younger man sighed softly against the pale skin. "Only once, with a girl. I rarely had time and I didn't feel the need to make time."_

"_It's understandable." L took two fingers in his mouth and sucked._

"_I've thought of something." His lips moved against L's skin. Acting suddenly, Raito pinned L's wrists to the bed and leaned over until their noses touched. He grinned. "I was letting you control me." He crushed their lips together._

_L gasped as Raito thrust into him. _You're more aggressive than I thought you'd be. This only increases the likelihood that you're Kira. _He moaned loudly at a particularly hard thrust, Raito groaned in reply. Teeth sank into his shoulder and he reveled in the pain. It took all his control not to scream out the thoughts that came with each wave of pleasure. _Seven percent… eight percent… nine percent…

_Raito's body shook at the unbearable pleasure of watching L lose control, listening to the sweet sounds spilling unhindered from his mouth. He reached down and began stroking the detective's member, making him cry out._

"_Raito! I… can't-" The words were cut off by a loud cry as Raito felt the entrance tightening around him. He gave a final thrust before coming._

_Rolling onto his side, he pulled L close to him, savoring the smell of their mingled sweat. L was content to lie with him for a moment before moving to his stomach to clean him of the remains of the night._

"_You're Kira." He said quietly._

"_I know."Raito replied, closing his eyes._

"_You know?"_

"_I know you think that and I can't do anything to change your mind."_

"_That's correct."_

"_L."_

"_Yes?"_

"_I love you."_

_The detective moved up to look in his eyes. "You would still kill me. Despite that, I love you too, Raito."_

_It was impossible to judge the sincerity of his words, but just hearing them from the detective's mouth was bliss._

_--_

When did people start calling a penis a member anyway? How did they come up with that? Everything in the English language is a double entendre.


End file.
